Bragging Rights

".....yeah, I saw one of those last week in Maui"

"I don't think I watched that episode, we were in Maui...."

"This is almost as good as the one I had last week, when I was in Maui"

"I should have taken one of those to Maui......."

"You know, they have something kinda like that in Maui....."

"I don't know, I haven't really caught up yet. We spent the last week in Maui...."

Ah, if nothing else a week in Hawaii sure is good for alot of bragging. More updates coming. Endless, bragging updates about my fabulous week in.... where were we? Oh yeah, Maui.

Seriously????

Ugh! I swear the universe has some perverse need to punish me whenever I wear yoga pants to school.

Yes, this morning I wore yoga pants to take the kids to school. I was in a hurry and I was tired and I decided it would be more productive for me to unload and load the dishwasher before leaving than to take the time to put on make-up. What a freakin' loser I am.

As I walked back to me car in the rain (oh yes, buckets of rain this A.M.) after dropping Duncan in his class 5 minutes late, no less, I realize my tire looks low. In reality, my tire looked flat. And that was because my tire was flat. Crap.

I debate about how to handle this little situation. Crying into a really big Margarita seemed to be the most reasonable thing I could come up with. No. I didn't. I drove to Chili's and asked my darling husband what to do since he was driving my car last night and he made my tire flat. And yes, I realize that it wasn't his fault and he didn't mean to make my tire flat. But, I was soaking wet, standing in the rain with no make-up on and a big ole t-shirt and yoga pants with flip flops that don't match. I needed someone to blame, okay?

I took it to Wal-Mart. Hubby suggested I take it to his friend's tire place. I looked at him like he had suggested I drive over to Mars to get it fixed.

"Yes honey, I would be honored to go chat with your buddy right about now" Um, no.

So, I spent approx. an hour this morning in the Wal-Mart looking like I just fit right in. And I now understand how it is possible that those people got there in their pajama pants.

Ants in the Pants..........literally

So, being a mother to a little boy continues to provide humor in quite unexpected ways.

Yesterday, I made coffee cake for breakfast and was preparing to serve it. Duncan was already in his seat at the table when he began his morning show.

"Mom. I want to tell you something I did but I won't get in trouble. K?"

Tricky little fellow, isn't he. I fell hook line and sinker for it, too.

"K." I called back only half listening as I searched for forks, napkins, milk cups, etc.

"Well, you know those plastic bugs we bought for the party?" he asked.

"I do." I said smiling because what he was calling a party was actual a camping themed dinner party for only the 4 of us that he had planned.

Now, he's smiling. And giggling. "Well," he says, now laughing," I put them in my..." he can't talk now because he's laughing so hard. He catches his breath and finally adds that last word, "pants."

His sister is in a fit of giggles and so is he. I am standing in the kitchen confused.

"When?" I demand.

Still having a hard time talking because he's laughing so hard so he tries to explain. "Right before you walked into my room. I just grabbed them and dropped them in." he doubles over in laughter at this point.

I am somewhat bewildered by this and his Daddy has joined us at this point and we're somewhere between laughing at him and considering therapy for him.

"And I can offer you proof," he announces and with that he reaches into his pants and begins pulling out plastic spiders, centipedes and other various nasty bugs.

That was enough to put us all over the edge. We're all laughing at this point and then as if he needed to say anything else he adds-

"Yeah, I just opened up the private hatch and dropped 'em right in"