I Spy

Sometimes I wish I had a secret spy camera that I could carry around Hill Billy Ville and take pictures for you all without anyone knowing. Random thoughts, I know.

But seriously these are the type of pictures that I couldn't take overtly, because I would probably offend the people I was photographing. Intrigued? Or just bored so you're gonna keep reading?

This morning while I was walking down the aisle in the Wal-Mart (yes, I have given up my self-imposed ban but more on that later...) there was a large woman who almost mowed me down with her grocery cart. She was eating an ice cream man style popsicle, one of those really big ones that is striped all different colors. And she actually made the "beep beep" sound at me. Yes, like when you are 2 years old and playing hot wheel cars on the carpet, beep beep sound. Never mind that she almost ran over me. Um, and could we revisit the popsicle for a minute? First of all, it's cold here this morning. Like the digital read out in my car said ICE when I got back in after shopping at Wal-Mart. But even on the hottest day of July- and if you don't live out here in the dessert, it is HOT here folks- why in the name of all that is good and holy would you eat a popsicle in Wal-Mart? Where did she even get it? Do you think she opened a box in the freezer section and took it as a snack? Maybe she thought I'll grab a grape or two to snack on through the produce section, ah heck, if I am gonna steal grapes why not a giant popsicle?

People I have a wonderful imagination but I couldn't even make this stuff up. I really wished I had a secret camera so I could have snapped a shot of her and her huge, striped popsicle to show you all here. But the only reason I even had that thought is because of the man/woman? I saw yesterday on my way into the CVS parking lot.

I needed a camera at that moment because I really needed a second opinion on what I saw. I am still not sure. However, I am fairly certain it was a man, in his late sixties or early seventies, riding a bicycle with two wheels on the back to accomodate the large basket/trailer thingy. That's not the funny part. What he was wearing was the funny part. It was a Hannah Montana wig. Not even kidding.

I have no idea why people are out looking for UFO's. Whether or not there are aliens up there really isn't the point. There is much scarier (albeit funny as all get out) stuff walking around on the ground.